Organization

I felt the need to write in my blog, this time using it more like a journal. Sean is sleeping right now (probably not for much longer), and I usually use this time to catch up- cleaning, facebook, appointments, etc. As I was taking the sheets off our bed to launder them, I looked around my room and felt sick. I used to be a very organized and fairly clean person. I have always been a pro at making messes, but I have also always been even better at cleaning up after myself (and all of the other males I have lived with over the years).

Ever since I have had a baby though, I feel like I have lost all control of my life. And parts of that I am okay with- I have come to accept and love the complete 180 change in my life for what it is. I love my son. I have fun with my son. Being a mom has taught me how to adapt to change, how to loosen up a bit, etc. But parts of it I am not okay with- I feel it is important to keep my house clean and organized- not because other people care, but because I care. Because I can't organize my brain when I am surrounded by a mess. I miss being thinner, and feeling pretty. And I cannot tell you how sick I am of hearing "welcome to mommyhood!!" I understand that I will always have messes to clean (and more so as my son gets older and mobile). I know I should give myself 9 months to lose the weight, since it took me 9 months to gain it. But I still feel out of control, and I am not okay with that.

So I have decided to take control with what I can, and not feel like a victim any longer. Here are a list of my hopes, and my goals.

Goals:

Lose the 30+ pounds I gained with my pregnancy

Keep my house at a clean I can live with, but realistically maintain as well

Go on a date night with my hubby at least once a month, if not more

My plan of action, in order to meet my goals:

Drink only water throughout the day

Try to cook dinner at least twice a week

Complete laundry at least twice a week (wash AND put away!)

Vacuum every 2 weeks

Organize bills/paperwork once a month

Ask for help when I need it

Relax : )

I am hoping this list will help me to organize my brain a little better, so that I can feel like I have a little bit of control again. And I may choose to modify/add to it as my brain becomes clearer and ready for more of a challenge. But this is a start!

Oh, and I promise to post an update on Sean soon- he is 3 months old now!! I just never really know what to say in my blog posts anymore. I feel like I am constantly repeating myself, so it makes it hard to summarize it all into a blog post. I guess that should be a goal to add as well- update my blog on Sean every month!!

11 weeks old : )

My mom has been bugging me about updating my blog, so here goes...

Our little man is 11 weeks old today. Man is he getting big! Haven't been to the doc since his 8 week check up, but I can tell you that my best guess is he is about 13 lbs. Mike commented (after being offshore for about 12 days) that he is much longer- his feet hang on the armrest of the chair when I am nursing him : )

Sean is so much fun : D He is a very happy baby- he smile and coos a lot, and he loves to carry on conversations with people. If he is very excited, he will actually talk over you : P We laugh at the sounds he makes- "un-guh" and "ga-goo" and "blah" are among his favorites. He said "oi" once the other day, which got me excited, so I spent the rest of the day pumping his fist and saying "oi oi oi!" but he didn't catch on.

I am getting excited for his next set of milestones- rolling over, grasping things with a purpose, and even showing interest in food. Of course, I have become more and more appreciative of soaking up him just as he is, because I know he will be crawling and getting into everything before we know it, and we will miss the days where he just laid there and cooed.

Now don't get me wrong- he is a very stubborn baby sometimes. He just about *requires* that I rock him to sleep. After every feeding (about every 2 hours) and also at bedtime. He loves to sleep, but during the day has a hard time staying asleep for more than 30 minutes at a time. At night he still does pretty well- he takes a bath about 7:30 and a bottle around 8 pm, and is usually asleep by 8:30. He then usually sleeps until about 1 am, then again until about 5 am, then again until 7ish. We are usually up and about by 8 or 9 am. I am happy he has his nights and days straightened out- his daytime naps are much different from his nighttime sleep. Our next step will be to cut him off from being rocked to sleep, but I am not in too big of a hurry for that one- as exhausting as it can be, I do love the feeling of being needed to go to sleep.

I officially told my job I don't plan to be back until I have to, which is February 28th, 2011. If I need to go back before then I will, but I figure we are saving money by not putting Sean into daycare, and I hardly use much gas anymore since I mostly drive to get groceries and that's about it. So I think we are making a good choice. But Mike is trying to find an onshore job now- he is really showing more of an interest in being home with us every night. We have no idea how long that will take, so he will take jobs offshore for as long as he needs to, until something more permanent comes up.

Here are some pics of Sean since my last update.... enjoy!!