Hey all!! I'm ready for a big change. And I wanted to document my experience along the way. If you look back through my old posts, you will see that I used to blog weekly! I enjoyed keeping a blog to show my progress in my first pregnancy, and also after my son was born to show his growth. I am planning to do the same thing here, but this time for myself!
I have been struggling with my diet and exercise habits since before my son was born, back in 2010. I have been yo-yo'ing with my weight ever since, and I am ready for a permanent lifestyle change!
My Journey begins here. I met some ladies in the MOMS club of South Hill/Puyallup when I first moved here a few months ago. Several of them were "beach body coaches" and I had no idea what that meant. I knew it had something to do with most of the infomercials I have seen for exercise videos, but that was about it. Then I saw how healthy many of these women really were. When I say healthy, I mean balanced in all areas of their lives. I noticed that exercise was a priority for them, but they also ate both clean and balanced meals, while still enjoying treats while we went out and about for playdates and such. Then I heard them influencing other moms who were trying a program called The 21 Day Fix. At first I blew it off because I heard that you had to drink protein shakes, and I am not a fan of replacing delicious food with boring old shakes. I figured if I wanted to feel full then I would eat, and if I wanted a milkshake I would get a real milkshake! LOL But after seeing a few friends in the club talk about how they were feeling, and comparing it to my current state of health (both mental and physical!) I told myself I would try, and I knew I could do anything for 21 days! And even if I hated it, then at the end of the program, at least I could say I had done something instead of nothing.
You see, after my daughter was born last summer, I began to feel random but extreme bouts of anxiety, quickly followed by depression. This was a new experience for me, so I decided to start seeing a therapist. After 12 weeks of group therapy sessions, I realized so many things about myself (one of them being that I had been experiencing anxiety for most of my life, the difference was that I was able to let it roll off my shoulders before, and previously I was not allowing it to affect my values and commitments.) I left my therapy sessions feeling like I needed to do more self care in order to keep myself sane and happy. I knew that my current eating habits and lack of activity was not doing me any good. I had a huge list of excuses- wanna hear them?
- My daughter was still very little, so sometimes I was getting poor sleep at night.
- My abdominals were shot after carrying her for 9 months in my belly.
- I hated being on a "diet" when I was pregnant (and diagnosed with gestational diabetes) and so I vowed to never deal with that kind of restriction on food again.
- I was too stressed out to think about what kind of food I was or wasn't eating, and I didn't have time for meal plans or diets.
- I didn't have the time or the energy to exercise.
- I couldn't afford a gym membership.
- I hated to do DVD workouts at home.
- My husband has an unpredictable schedule, so I couldn't depend on him for consistent child watching so that I could get out of the house to exercise.
- I didn't want to spend twice as much money on groceries for the husband and kids, and also have to buy "diet" food for myself.
- I didn't want to fail again.
You want to know something? I wasn't do myself any favors by making these excuses. I wasn't doing myself any good. I needed to find a REASON to change my behavior, rather than looking for an EXCUSE to not change my behavior. My reasons for changing my current state of health are because I want to feel good again. I want to feel sexy. I want to have energy. I want to grow older and be the kind of 60 year old woman that can go for a jog. I want to be healthy as I age, and avoid going to the doctor for a permanent diagnosis such as heart disease or diabetes.
Most importantly, I want to set a healthy body image for my kids. I want to show then what it looks like to eat healthy and exercise regularly. I don't want to teach them to obsess over foods or worry about how they look. But I do want to them to know that some foods are eaten for pleasure while others are eaten to fuel your body. Exercise is intended to rejuvenate you and keep you feeling young. I want those things for myself and I want them for my family too.
So today I am going to take you on my Journey with me. I have already completed 1 round of the 21 Day Fix. In that 3 week period I lost 5 pounds and a total of 9.5 inches. In that period of time my ability to handle my anxiety and depression has gotten so much stronger. I don't think I will ever "kick" that condition. But I can learn how to go with the flow, and let those thoughts and physical sensations from anxiety and depression not get the best of me. I can accept them as part of my experience and move on to the things in my life that really matter.
Everyday, I get up in the morning and I exercise. Afterwards I am sore, but I feel like I am on top of the world. I make my bed and put my dishes away and I feel like I have accomplished something important. In reality, I am just doing my everyday, nothing special. But I like feeling like my everyday can potentially be amazing for me. And I feel amazing, so why not? I am starting my second round of the 21 Day Fix today, and I plan on working harder than I did yesterday, and maybe even a little bit more.
Stay tuned. I am really and truly going to try and post everyday. Heck, I am even making it a goal to take a picture of my meals everyday so I can put them into my posts. My goal is to have something I can reflect on at the end of this round of 21 days.
Another goal of mine is to be inspiring to others to make the same kind of changes in their own lives. As Autumn says, "If you are tired of starting over, then stop giving up!" I am making a commitment to stop giving up, and if you find yourself in a similar situation I hope you will too.
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